THANKS TO ALL "FATHERS"

by Efren Dancel


Last week, June 18, we celebrated Father's day. One my best friend texted me about a Father. He is:

1% funny
2% sweet
3% caring
4% loving
90% Babaero

We'll maybe a lot of our batchmates who are now fathers (father of a family, fathered a child, or a father of the Church) have also received different kinds of messages recognizing their hardwork, patience, and accomplishments. You all need a one hell of a special day. Hopefully will have siblings' day? Paging GMA.

I went to EDSA Shangrila last week to have my pants tapered and have my shoes fix. While inside the mall, I went on a window shopping in the shoe stores. I noticed that most of the dads were the "king" that day. The wife and kids followed their daddy from one shoe store to the other. In one store that I happened to dropped by, a man, who is in his mid 40 to 50s, immediately grabbed the casual shoes that I've just returned from its display, and requested the salesperson, "size 10 nga". I overheard the wife said to his husband, "Hon, bagay sa iyo yan". "Oo nga dad", sip-sip naman ng kids. There were 2 things I asked myself: (1) is my taste gearing towards that of a father or the father just want to be a groovy father?; (2) are the wife and kids telling the truth or were they just impatient with shopping thing?

Speaking of a groovy father, last Monday I went to Cebu with my colleague for an official business. He was in his 40 to 50s, dressed very cool in his short sleeves polo shirt, Marks and Spencer's Harbour brand, jeans, and black casual shoes. At night, he sported a colored t-shirt and jeans. It really fits his looks and personality. But what is likeable about this dad was his pride for the achievement of his son, who is a Wesleyan University scholar. We had the chance to browse the schools virtual tour through my laptop and free wi-fi, courtesy of the hotel where we're staying. I was amazed that we can view his son's regular schedule from bio-researcher student, musician, accapela artist, and in-charge of orienting new students. Wow! what a versatile child. Like father, like son! We too have experienced the same traits or skills of our fathers have or have developed it for better.

I was planning to write a tribute to my dad before Father's day because of the article I read from Youngblood in the Inquirer about her "tribute to her Nanay". Similar to Alex's article. However, I really don't know where to start, because I have never seen my biological father. I guess I'm thankful for giving me life in this world as well as that of my step brother and sisters. We had our chance to see each other face to face when I was in grade school but I guess I was not ready at that time. I have lots of biases in my mind because of the stories I've heard with my mom and nanay (yaya). Stories like, he was a great liar because he already had a family when he met my mom; would always hurt my mom whenever they quarrelled; never provided me with milk; threatened cab drivers to give him money or else their car would be impounded and many other negative stories that you could imagine. I never saw him until he passed away last February 1986. Will I despise him now for what he did? I believe NO. Because God is so good that He gave me the opportunity to heal my wounded past while inside the seminary. I forgave him for all the things he did to me and I look forward to meeting and embracing him after my earthly mission is done. While there is pain, there are no regrets in my heart whenever I think of him because I have a Father in heaven who provides and takes care of me.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank the following persons who have given me a "father image" in their own little way:

1. Reynaldo Padua, my step dad and who lent his surname for me from pre-school to college;
2. Joaquin Tan, who brought out the anger within me;
3. Fr. Modesto Lopez, who have been my highschool father and shaped my values in life;
4. Jess Dawisan, my uncle who always believes in my capabilities;
5. Jess Liao, who taught me the chiness way of doing business;
6. Greg Chua, who have been my mentor at Insular life, cool guy under pressure;
7. Fr. Rey Garcia, who is a spiritual director, friend, brother;
8. Fr. Rufo Dino, who paved the way to appreciate life outside the seminary;
9. Fr. Armando Litana, who have been a spiritual director and friend when I was outside of the seminary.

May all the batchmates "fathers" bring inspiration to the ACM and VAI and the rest of the world!